Are We Working Our Heads Off For Nothing?

Life can be lived one of two ways.

It is a daily struggle not live life for myself, pursuing only what is in my best interest and what will boost my rapport among those I admire. I have been influenced from a tender age that I am to put myself first and do whatever is necessary to establish wealth, position and power; essentially who we are, what we do, and how much we make, will establish our social status, credibility and worth.

Though I tried to follow these guidelines to success, I realized that no satisfaction is attained through this way of living. Getting my own way makes me happy for a moment but leaves me only desiring more. This reading below summed it up really well for me:

It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage; frenzied and joyless grabs for happiness; trinket gods; magic show religion; paranoid loneliness; cut throat competition; all-consuming-yet-never-satisfied wants; a brutal temper; an impotence to love or be loved; divided homes and divided lives; small minded and lopsided pursuits; the vicious habit of depersonalizing everyone into a rival; uncontrolled and uncontrollable addictions; ugly parodies of community. I could go on.

But what happens when we live God's way?

He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard----things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.

(The Message)

Backbone Vs. Wishbone

"I wish I was thin"
"I wish I had a better job"
"I wish my relationships were better"
"I wish I was out of debt"

I wish, I wish, I wish....

How often do we hear these types of statements? And how often do we find ourselves muttering these very same ideas? Wishing only creates delusions in our reality. It's time to press through the pain of discipline and direct our ambitions in to action.

"At the time-being no discipline brings joy, it seems grievous and painful, but afterward it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those that have been trained by it"

As Joyce Meyer put it, "You pay now, or you pay later, but sooner or later everybody's going to pay".

We must begin to make right choices even while we don't feel like it. The majority of our battle is pressing through the pain of feelings, so that we might move forward in success. Though in the present no discipline seems joyous, nevertheless later on...
Let us get motivated by the "later on"! The price we pay now is small in comparison to the rewards we will reap later! Discipline will provide for us a sturdy backbone so that we might function properly and with efficiency enabling us to live with vitality.

Imagine the limitations placed on an individual who is De-conditioned or has developed a spinal injury. As a result of their immobility, inflammation and degeneration occur unless disciplined action is taken. Though the beginning training phases will likely cause discomfort and soreness, it is essential if the individual desires to retain strength and functionability in the long term. The pain will only increase if the individual takes no action. Who, with the knowledge of the alternate outcome, would decline a rehabilitation training? We all want the freedom to move about independently and live life to the fullest, so why is it that we slack when it comes to our mental and emotional state?

Let us implement a focused discipline toward our wishful wants, and let us not settle for less then the best God has for us! We die where we settle. We might not die physically, but our dreams die, our visions die, our zeal dies, our passion dies, our enthusiasm for life dies...

Why? Because we aren't pressing in to the best God has for us; we simply didn't want the pain.
Unfortunately, we end up with the pain anyway. We are going to hurt one way or the other, it's just the type of pain we choose. There is no worse pain then an unfulfilled, dissatisfied life because we know in our heart we didn't have the courage to press in.

Pay now, or pay later...but sooner or later we're all going to pay.

Positive Reinforcement

When was the last time you dined out and purposefully pulled the Manager aside to compliment the service provided to you?

When was the last time you were in a retail/dining establishment and called on a manager to complain about your service?

It's quite common for us to react when we feel we are being treated less then we expect. As individuals we form an expectation of how we should be regarded and responded to. When life obeys these expectations we move along in our day with no sense of gratitude or joy in the fact that our desires are met.

However, as soon as that person driving on the freeway cuts us off, or the waitress at the restaurant cannot seem to instantaneously produce food, or someone with 32 items is in the "10 items or less" checkout line in front of us we are quickly agitated!

The ratio of positive events in relation to the moments of madness that we seem to marinate in is alarming! Rather then allowing some menial moments of dissatisfaction rule our attitude and response lets start reinforcing the positive elements that we encounter. (Caption on the photo above reads:"How to motivate people? a little push in the right direction can make a big difference".)

Purposefully :
Thank someone for their assistance, even if it is something required of them by their employer.

Acknowledge the checkout service person and grocery bagger at the supermarket. Smile!

Reinforce positive work ethic that you observe in your place of employment.

Encourage those you detect to be diligent and determined in an expertise.

Rather then using colorful language due to a traffic encounter, remember that you, more than likely, have once been that person and extend grace.

The more we focus our attention on the many positive rendezvous' throughout the day, we will have no choice but to be increasingly joyful, have an enhanced emotional/mental state, reduced stress, and we will begin to realize how truly provided for we are.

Not to mention, our "offenders" will receive the fruits of our labor; And all in all it will come full circle!

Lets get intentional about positive reinforcement!!

Worrisome Heart

Worry:–verb

1.to torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts; fret.(dictionary.com)


Worry...
+ It adds nothing
- Subtracts everything
x Multiplies fears
/ Divides relationships
------------------------------
= Equals disaster



The question is how to stop?

Like anything worthwhile it requires diligence and steadfastness. Emotions and feelings have to be the most difficult senses to hunker down on and keep in order. They are much like a defiant child, as soon as you turn your back they return to their mischievous stratagem. Fortunately with defiant children we are able to lock ourselves in the restroom for a few minutes to regain our sanity; lamentably emotions are woven throughout us and are not cordial enough to allow us time alone.

The solution that has deemed worthy of success time and time again is the act of taking your thoughts captive and praying.

Imagine our mind displaying all it's thoughts on a monitor on our forehead. Would we not be more concerned with it's content? I know I would! Honesty is the best policy, but geez there is a way of bringing truth with grace....regrettably not always how my thoughts formulate. So in imagining our minds in this way, envision capturing the conniving and crass thoughts, bind up the fear, lies and worry; Arrest these detrimental thoughts that are formulating false beliefs within us and constantly give them to God by praying to Him. Ask Him for help and bring your frustrations to Him. He is eager to talk with us and desiring to show His character which is Faithful and True.

You may be thinking I am far out there, but try it for one day. I guarantee it to be a challenge greater then you anticipate. I figured it sounded easy to "take my thoughts captive" for one day, but truthfully, just in the first hour I don't think I stopped praying to God about my thoughts!

He has never failed me even when I turn my back on Him. He can't, it's against His nature. I don't know about you but that is the kind of God I need and definitely the one I choose.

Happy Capturing!

Learning to Grow

Never to suffer would never to have been blessed.

--Edgar Allan Poe

Suffering.

Not many would consider it something beneficial, much less something to look forward to.
Suffering may involve physical pain, loss, stress, illness, betrayal, disappointment, injustice, or abuse. How many of us would pay a large sum if it meant your life would be exempt from any agony? Count me in!

Everyone of us, however, is destined to walk through valleys of suffering, hardships, and trials; it is the result of a fallen world. So how do we do it successfully?

The church since it's earliest days has often portrayed the Christian life as one of mountain top highs, without valleys. It sounds ideal, and the ignorant may jump aboard, but how could this be so? A mountain without a valley is no mountain at all.

"A message that ignores the valleys is not big enough for life. It raises false expectations, and it has nothing to say to a suffering world."(Unlocking The Bible in 30 Days--Smith)

Every Christian-- every human rather, to walk the face of this Earth will face trouble, hardships, persecution, betrayal, loss, abandonment etc...The first thing God wants us to know however, is that it is not meaningless. "And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings', Paul writes in Romans, 'because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.'"

The mountain tops revive our spirit as we feel assured we are headed in the right direction. It provides a moment for our packs to be loosened, our bodies to recharge and rest and reflect before repelling down to the valley ahead.

Something comes from our suffering. Character is developed. As we seek God for direction and guidance, His love produces hope. Slowly our idiosyncrasies begin to align with His word and desire for our lives. Ultimately life becomes an impending adventure.

As we mature in character we begin to scale cliffs and crags we never imagined possible. Hence, our character sharpens, and suddenly suffering is not something to fear but rather an entity to embrace. We learn that God is not punishing us through our times of hardship but truthfully He loves us and desires for us to reach full maturity in character and hope.

Naturally, we choose to avoid pain and resistance in our circumstances, yet that leaves us on a plain. An ordinary, unattractive, unostentatious life where living beings do not flourish to the full potential. Sometimes we circle round and round the mountains in life looking for an elevator rather then attempting the steep gradient before us. God so faithfully has placed us in rough terrain to keep us in training; fit in body, mind and soul!

" Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."--2 Cor. 4:16+17

Do not lose heart if you are going through a time of discomfort and disappointment. Maybe you are struggling financially, or in your marriage, maybe you have lost your place of employment, or your family member, maybe you are enduring physical pain, or a spiritual desert. Whatever it might possibly be, please know that God has a purpose, a plan, and a shining outcome for you. Do not blame him or resent him for your hurting, try trusting him that he is faithful to see you through it.

Even Helen Keller, a woman of ultimate trial and tribulation declared,

"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved."

Magnitude of a Moment

You may have heard it said, "Today is a gift, that is why it's called the present". Each morning that we arise, is a gift, it's not guaranteed and inevitably there will be a day the sun rises yet we stay asleep.

Today I woke before the sun to take on a strenuous exercise class. I didn't necessarily feel thankful as I woke up seeing that it was 4:30 am, but God spoke to me on my drive home as I came up to stop and go traffic. Listening to one of my favorite songs, sun roof open, tapping along with the beat and slowly inching forward I began to see the familiar flashing lights of an ambulance. My heart sunk as it was my turn to pass the wreckage along the center divide of the 680 freeway.

The vehicle was unrecognizable, and surely if someone survived it would have had to be a complete miracle. The entire automobile was crushed flat, lying diagonally on its side, surrounded by medical personnel working vigorously to disengage any potential survivors. As the only logical thing I could think to do, I began to pray for the driver and possible passengers, for their families, and for all who were viewing this tragedy.

For the Passer by-er's would an incident like this reignite their conscience and spirit? Cause them to ponder the magnitude of each moment? Or would they simply be frustrated due to the inconvenience of traffic and step on the accelerator to make up for lost minutes in their commute?

It only takes a moment for something to change the course of our eternity. A moment holds great potential. Each moment has the possibility to be magnificent or mundane. Each day we are given, we have the opportunity to make it magnanimous or monotonous. Living with the courage to be intentional about the use of your time, your life, your actions and responses, gives you an edge, a sharpness that renders respect and dignity. By consciously living out each moment it forces us to be present, and aware, using every opportunity to it's greatest potential. Our most dignified heroines are those who had the courage to give of themselves for the greater good of their surrounding populace; the courage to use their moments to unknowingly pave the path for many future descendants to follow.

It's a mental battle to precisely focus on each moment but it's worth the war. Setting our eyes too far ahead will have us constantly overlooking the gifts that are the present.


"Everything in the world is about to be wrapped up, so take nothing for granted. Stay wide-awake in prayer. Most of all, love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless---cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God's words; if help, let it be God's hearty help. That way, God's bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and he'll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything".
1 Peter 4:7-11(The Message----Bible in Contemporary English)


"The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear-minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in it's various forms"
1 Peter 4:7-10(NIV)

Something to Consider

It's tough to be a woman of character and integrity, one who values themselves and their family, one who nurtures and encourages, one who knows when and how to set boundaries. American culture, specifically in the California bay area, has provided images and interpretations of what a 'woman' should be, but this is not who I desire to be.

This ideal woman has narrow margins. She should be capable of delivering peak performance at all times, including at her high ranking job, with her husband, with her children, the home should be neat and tidy, and most emphasis is placed upon her physique...Of course she should be a size 2 and have a flat stomach and tight buns.

Now there is nothing wrong with taking care of your physique, don't misinterpret me ladies. Health should be number two on your chart just below your spiritual life. Everything else will build upon these two factors. Seeing the rapid degradation of character and value for self, in both men and women, though leads me to believe we need to get back to issues of the soul. When it comes down to the reality of our human frailty and our lack of power to predestine our individual lives, it's time to do some soul searching. There is a fine balance between personal power and development and our spiritual journey--in fact I would argue, you may not successfully have one without the other. Rather then popping Xanax like breath mints, it's time to go to that uncomfortable place and find TRUTH.

We aren't all fashioned to be the next Miss America, or the top CEO of a fortune 500. We aren't all gifted to do Martha Stewart makeovers, or be the next Mrs. Cleaver. Truth tells us, find God, Acknowledge His power over/in/through the life he has given you, Accept it(the most challenging part), and He will reveal who He has designed you to be.

This is the type of woman I desire to be...my modern version is noted with the ---:)

The Good Wife

A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long.
She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing
----21st century version--she dresses well;), and can handle sewing on a button---
She's like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises
----She is not fearful of new territory and keeps the married life exciting----
She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it, then, with the money she's put aside, plants a garden.
----She wisely invests in areas that will reap reward/return----
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
----She doesn't stay in her PJ's all day and she completes her duties with enthusiasm----
She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
----perseverance----
She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in home making.
----She does what it takes to make a house a home...she shops at Target----
She's quick to assist anyone in need , reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn't worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are mended&ready to wear.
----She makes sure her family is put together----
She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks.
----She purchases clothing that accentuates her beauty----
Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knit to the dress shops.
----She puts her talent to good use and donates to the less fortunate----
Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.
When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive.
----She doesn't allow her kids to sleep until 2 and is not a friend of laziness----
Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise:
"Many woman have done wonderful things but you've outclasses them all!"
Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades.
The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.
Give her everything she deserves!
Adorn her life with praises!


The collective version of Proverbs 31.